~~ And it's started. The spotting. One wonderful, supportive, always-there friend to whom I am forever bonded now as we trudge this difficult path to parenthood - together we are mothers with empty arms after losing our little girls last year - is quite possibly staring in the face of another early pregnancy loss. If there was someone I would sacrifice my own chance to have a child for it would be her. ~~
Earlier in the day, a new babe was born. Again, to another very dear friend. It's so interesting how quickly you can form a cement-hard friendship with these blokes in dresses (yup Dad's words are still ringin') and it seems like only yesterday that she caught my attention in a buddy group we were both frequenting. After a pissy altercation that began when I got on my indignant high horse (or was that just my bike? hmmm) and took offence at something I thought she was saying - ah the joys of the written medium - we started pm'ing each other back and forth addictively. In those heady early days of getting to know someone at lightning speed, we were horrified yet hugely excited how much we had in common. It was, indeed as she mused once, as if we shared a central nervous system. Of course, thank goodness or I would have killed her if she'd been too much like me, more differences have come to light as we've stretched our friendship and gone through this year, and her miraculous long awaited pregnancy, together. Ever ready with a daggy pick-me-up line and not afraid to slap me out of my voodoo doll room either. God, the shite we've nattered on about. Bliss! (If dumb general tv/movie knowledge was an Olympic sport, I'd be on the team for sure). I feel so blessed to call her my friend.
As her EDD drew nearer, to be perfectly honest I thought I was going to have to run to Dr Pesky (indeed, Medicine Woman) and have a cry-fit. I am not too good this past 18 months with seeing friends and relatives have their precious babies. But I have been nothing but buoyant and excited and I've come over all emotional at how happy and relieved I am that she and her (I'm sure) gorgeous wee boy are safe and over that most trecherous part - his birth. Yes it's true: my innocence is well and truly lost and I still struggle with envisaging myself the cool, calm cucumber I was on Ella's birth day. I look forward to seeing how I perform....
So there it is. One baby born. One to come. One currently in the throes of deciding what its lesson is going to be and whether it will stay to stake claim as a permanent member of a family. The cycle of life. Beautiful and shit all at once, don't you think?
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